DAMN RIGHT I CAN LEAVE THE TOILET SEAT UP!

And in other news: Area health officials became concerned when growing number of men started visiting their doctors, complaining having to rush out of bed to the bathroom due to urgent urination issues and being 'angry as all get-out'. Further analysis revealed all of these men had recently purchased memory foam mattresses from the local super store over the holiday weekend; leading to the condition now dubbed as 'Temper Pee Dick'.